An Expression Of A Deeper Order

Since my last post here, life consisted of, what I thought to be, a long string of events (random or otherwise). I struggled to keep up, it seemed as though I was hopscotching on one foot from one square to the next and barely keeping myself upright as I was doing it. There were momentary respites, here and there, exceedingly brief and all too fleeting. "Breathe", I kept reminding myself, "just breathe". I have been wearing many hats: wife, mother, grandmother, daughter-- all at the same time. In the course of the last four weeks we sold my in-law's home, said good-bye to our son's precious canine companion: Diesel, hosted my parents for a two week visit, kept our two youngest grandchildren during our daughter-in-law's scheduled surgery and recuperation, transported little ones to and from their designated schools and activities, celebrated our next to youngest grandchild's seventh(!) birthday and through it all endeavored to keep up with laundry, get meals on the table, and maintain a house that was, somewhat, clean and tidy. All of a sudden, it seems, life has slowed back down and a quick glance out the window reveals that the seasons have changed during all of the hub-bub of activity. Yes, through it all God has been there; strengthening, supporting and  revealing Himself in the most glorious way. This, from a Bible Study I am preparing for today: "we have talked about marriage and family as a vocation or calling from God. This calling is lived out within the struggles and trials of life in this world as God gives us to others as people to count on and receive help from." Today, my husband is spending his time at home doing all of those long postponed projects now that we have only one house again, our son and his family have begun to heal the hole in their hearts by welcoming a new furry friend into their lives and home, family relationships have been strengthened and fortified while making memories through time spent together and, our daughter-in-law is resuming her normal activities once again and daily life is settling back into a familiar rhythm; all while bathed in the resplendent golden glow of autumn (lest I forget who's been in control all along)! 

Thanks be to God!

Life is Good!

photo credit: Bill Voigt 
quote credit: Mary Alice Monroe, from The Butterfly's Daughter

From My Heart

There is someting on my mind today, something I want to bring forth to you from my heart. I've shared a lot here over the last (almost) ten years: the courtship and eventual wedding of our youngest, the births of our grandchildren, illnesses, injuries, crises, childhood memories, family, home improvements, travel journals, the adventures of Hannes, celebrations, nature, victories, failures, books, movies, friends and faith to name a few; oh, and quilts... so many quilts! If you think that this post is going to be more of the same, you would be wrong. Today I am going to share something new, something that is deeply personal, the subject of which is likely to appear in upcoming posts and I want you to hear the back-story here first and not be confused. When I was growing up my mother taught me never to discuss two subjects in mixed company: politics and religion. I have never touched either one of those here, until today; and it won't be politics!

Our family has been a member of the same church since 1975. My husband even longer, he was a member as a child, in the mid 1960's. We moved away for job relocations and returned, as he had when he was a boy, always to the same church. Our children grew up there; were baptized, confirmed, married and their babies were baptized there... at the same font where their parents were welcomed into God's family. Our friends are there, relationships developed over decades of raising children together, fellowship activities and serving God on a myriad of committees together. We have strong relationships with our Pastors there, and the staff. And yet, given all of that, I felt strongly this past summer that God was calling me away from that place. It is hard to write, even now, how painful that realization was. I rationalized, I bargained, I struggled, I cried, I even tried to ignore God's nudge. It was impossible. My husband felt the same calling, his response was the same. We prayed; separately, and together, for clear discernment. What is this type of discernment we prayed for, you might ask. Well, one of the best definitions of it, in the Biblical sense, is found here:

From Grace To You by John MacArthur:

The key to living an uncompromising life lies in one's ability to exercise discernment in every area of his or her life. For example, failure to distinguish between truth and error leaves the Christian subject to all manner of false teaching. False teaching then leads to an unbiblical mindset, which results in unfruitful and disobedient living-a certain recipe for compromise. 

Unfortunately, discernment is an area where most Christians stumble. They exhibit little ability to measure the things they are taught against the infallible standard of God's Word, and they unwittingly engage in all kinds of unbiblical decision-making and behavior. In short, they are not armed to take a decidedly biblical stand against the onslaught of unbiblical thinking and attitudes that face them throughout their day.

Discernment intersects the Christian life at every point. And God's Word provides us with the needed discernment about every issue of life. According to Peter, God "has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence" (2 Peter 1:3). You see, it is through the "true knowledge of Him," that we have been given everything we need to live a Christian life in this fallen world. And how else do we have true knowledge of God but through the pages of His Word, the Bible? In fact, Peter goes on to say that such knowledge comes through God's granting "to us His precious and magnificent promises" (2 Peter 1:4).

I don't believe it was a coincidence that my husband and I felt led away at the same time. There are no coinidences with God. And yet, at the time, I didn't recognize that. After counsel with church leaders, crying gallons of tears and feeling as though we were being physically torn in two, we did leave our beloved church. "What now, God? This is scary!"

Through God's grace a new mission church has begun. It's not been easy, but God has been there directing every step; support has been supplied generously at each turn. Tomorrow will be the fourth scheduled worship service. We are in a temporary location right now and have had our share of hiccups along the way. At the inaugural worship service the organ decided to die near the conclusion of the first hymn. And yet, God's faithful people rose and sang, unaccompanied. On the second Sunday it began snowing about an hour before worship began. And yet, God's faithful people came. Last Sunday the service had to be cancelled due to snow and icy road conditions. And yet, God's people move forward; with His help and guidance, He is there with us in the Sunday School program and at Women's Bible Study. I share all of this with you today because I feel led to do so. This blog chronicles my life and faith and represents who Mrs. Goodneedle is, this new chapter is simply just too big, too good, not to share! Has the road thus far been easy? Absolutely not. From a personal standpoint, I still grieve the loss of what was, as does my husband. Has this move been worth the pain? Yes!, there is nothing but joy and excitement in our hearts and souls over what is!  God has richly blessed this new mission church. There is no doubt in my mind that stepping out in faith was exactly the right thing to do at this time. God had already chosen the path. Please join us in prayer for the future of Grace Lutheran Church. We give thanks for all that He has done and all that is to come.

Life is Good!

Give It Away!

"Love in your heart wasn't put there to stay.  Love isn't love 'til you give it away."   - Oscar Hammerstein

Love; it's this weeks' Advent word. My husband and I walked into church yesterday morning to be greeted by a friend, she came right up to me with a sad look in her eye. "I have some bad news" she began, " it's really bad." I braced myself. She went on to tell us that our church's Parish Administrator had unexpectedly and suddenly died over the weekend. I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach, I certainly hadn't braced myself firmly enough to receive that tragic news! Phyllis, our efficient and always professional Parish Administrator could easily run our church office with one hand tied behind her back; she knew everything, every one, and kept it all straight. There was never any confusion as to where she stood or what was being handled, Phyllis was a straight shooter and a clear communicator. In every phone call, e-mail or face to face meeting that I had with her over the years I always came away feeling confident and reassured that whatever business we had spoken about was being tended to, and well. We became friends as time passed and we both became grandmothers, often chatting about the joys of grandchildren; and yet, Phyllis was always the consummate professional when it came to the church office. Late this past spring she was plagued with back pain and time after time had to postpone treatment because of some chronic breathing and pulmonary issues. At long last, about three weeks ago, she was deemed healthy enough to undergo back surgery and she came through that procedure with flying colors. Last Thursday I checked on her and learned that she had a Dr.'s appointment that afternoon and was doing fine. Her last Facebook status update, dated November 28, confirmed her now pain-free state and her desire to get back to work as soon as possible.

How was the news that I had just heard even possible? 

I sat in the sanctuary yesterday morning and tried to remember the last time I had seen Phyllis and spoken with her. All of a sudden the moment came flooding back, as clear as could be. We were standing in the hall outside the church offices, she was hurting and had come in to tend to busisness for as long as she could that day; she was eagerly looking forward to getting her surgery behind her. I told her that I would be praying for her. She started to walk away, turned back toward me and said "I love you." I echoed that sentiment right back to her, extremely uncharacteristic behavior; and yet, in that time and space it didn't seem unusual at all. I walked away feeling God's presence between us and surrounding us. I knew that she was going to be okay. This exchange haunted me yesterday, but in a very good way. I am so deeply thankful now that I expressed those words of love, I had no way of knowing then that they would be the very last words we'd ever speak to each other.

So, back to our Advent word of the week: love; don't hold it too tight. Remember the rhyme by Hammerstein, live it; your heart can't possibly hold onto all the love that you have. By all means... give it away; you will be so glad that you did!

Life is Good!

A Grace-filled Life

I live a blessed life, filled to overflowing with moments of pure grace. By Christian definition grace is the free and unmerited favor of God, as manifested in the salvation of sinners and the bestowal of blessings. My constant prayer is that I remain open to these blessings and aware of the true gifts that they are; and, more importantly, from where they come... always returning thanks back to God. 

A few years back I kept a gratitude journal after reading Sarah Ben Breathnach's book: Simple Abundance. The book was a gift from my daughter and I found it to be transformative. Since then I have developed a heightened awareness of blessings and grace moments, although I have long-ago given up the practice of actually keeping the journal; every now and then I think I should go back to that habit of actually writing them down, it's a humbling experience.

On Saturday we traveled to the Capital City to watch Mason play soccer. Our oldest grandchild has developed quite a competitive spirit and is a great team player; to be there and witness his God-given athletic abilities and his cooperative nature was such a treat. I realized suddenly, standing right there on the sidelines in the warm late morning heat, how very much I had to be thankful for: our close proximity to all of our grandchildren, their good health, our own good health and for the loving family unit that binds us together... blessings bestowed. Grace comes: not always in big and monumental ways, it comes in the everyday moments. Over the last few days it has come on the sidelines of that soccer field, it came around the dinner table over a simple sandwiches shared with loved ones, it came at a quilt guild meeting in unexpected surprises received from thoughtful friends, and just today in a loving note from a kind and generous friend who is going through a grief period of her own. These grace moments are so sweet, so tender, and so pure that they touch my heart and reduce me to tears. How can I possibly be worthy? How can I ever be grateful enough for all of these blessings and this life filled with God's grace? I am assured that God is there, in the midst of each sacred instant, and that God is also working within me; to be there, to bear His grace, and to pass it along. I'll do my best. How has grace touched your life today? Look around, you'll see! It's what we do next that really counts...

Mason (front row, left) and the Defeaters

Life is Good!

Sunday's LOVE Potpourri

I know, I know... I left you all at sea in my last post. I will return to the Hawaiian Islands and give you a wrap up of the highlights of our trip last month in the coming days. However, in the meantime, life has been consumed by the here and now and the calendar page has turned to February already; the month of love. Let me share with you today a few random and unrelated LOVES that I have experienced over the past few weeks. Of course, you've been introduced to the latest love of my life, Lynnleigh, our newest grand baby and second granddaughter. This photograph was sent to me by my daughter, it is Lucy Ann(2) holding her new baby cousin. Look at their hands. Okay, I may be a bit biased, these are my own granddaughters; but, isn't it just the sweetest picture? I think so, I LOVE it.

Another new LOVE of mine: A Christmas gift from a dear friend, my very first quilt teacher! It is a book, a daily devotional guide: Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. I have added a link here so that you can read a bit about the book and even preview a few pages, check it out. It is a book that has really struck a chord with me and I highly recommend it.

Granny Smith Apple Slaw, have you ever eaten a slaw made from apples instead of cabbage? I hadn't until a few weeks ago and it was fabulous. I have researched a recipe and found this one, I believe it's pretty close to the one I had, served alongside a barbecued chicken breast; I hope you give it a try, you may just LOVE it too.

In between a few days helping my daughter in law out with child care as she gradually returns to full strength and good health I have managed to return to the sewing machine and knocked a few things off my "to do" list; gotta LOVE that!

The daffodils are completely and totally confused around these parts. Our weather fluctuates between balmy and spring-like to frigid. I have some daffs budded out and holding, but our neighbor's yard is full of flash-frozen blossoms! Although I find, what I believe to be an all-too-soon emergence sad, I LOVE the reassurance and comfort that goes along with the knowledge that God is in control, His timing is perfect and that He keeps his promises... season after season.

Life is Good!

Where Does It Go?

Time flies when you're having fun, that is most certainly true. It flies when you're not too. Let's face it, time flies. Where does it go? My "to-do" lists have been filled with appointments and commitments lately, there goes the time, in both the planning and the doing. I could write lists upon lists of all the tasks I want to get back to, I need to get back to, the ones that have been crowded out lately; the ones that have been pushed to the back burner because there's no time left. I have felt pulled in too many directions, way beyond a stretching point that's comfortable. I sat down to prepare a Bible study for presentation this morning. I opened to the book of John and began to read of God's gift of living water, through Jesus, to the woman at the well. God's peace settled around me like a well-worn quilt, I was wrapped and warmed by it. The gift of time opened and I dug deep into the vault, I had all that I needed. I was cheered and reassured, all was well and I could take my time; God would give me all that I needed!

Life is Good!

The Things You Can't See

We received the phone call on Thursday evening last week, the son of friends of ours from church had been struck by a car while riding his bicycle. My heart sank. The phone report was optimistic, although he was bruised and battered it looked like he was going to be OK; in time. A quick 'thank you' prayer was offered up to God! I thought of this boy's parents and the anguish they were going through in a local emergency room. I thought of the friend who called us, she and her husband were on the scene just moments after the accident occurred, they had waited with our young friend until the ambulance arrived. Naturally, too, I thought about this boy and his physical pain and how frightened he must have been. And then, the second call came. My heart, at an already low level, sunk yet again. The driver of the car that struck him was a neighbor, a friend. She'd never seen him riding there, along side of the road as she slowed to make a right turn, she was almost home. He never saw her, either. He popped up off the side of the road to turn toward home, too... he was just a few yards from his own front door. I could only imagine her pain now, what has to be the worst nightmare of every single person who ever gets behind a steering wheel; a child, appearing out of nowhere, with no time to stop the car! I've seen our young friend since he has returned home, he's scraped up and bandaged, his wounds are visible to the world, he was playing a video game last evening and making plans to go back to school soon. He was talkative and hopeful for a speedy recovery. My neighbor's wounds are very different, they're not visible on the outside. Her pain is deep, debilitating and profound. Much like an iceberg, it's the portion below the surface that requires the most attention; her wounds will take time too, perhaps much more than the physical variety.

"Dear God, Help me remember that it's the things I can't see where
I need to pay the closest attention. I trust in you to lead me,
and open my eyes to all things, that I may be a blessing to those around me."

Life is Good!

"Pray First"

I'm back from Synod Assembly. There was much inspiration and thoughtful, prayer-filled deliberation, too. On Saturday morning there were tributes to Pastors who have retired since the last Assembly a year ago. When his name was called one of these recent retirees took the stage, stood at the microphone, and shared this story; I have a feeling that you'll enjoy it as much as I did.

" There once was a man who had nothing for his family to eat. He had an old rifle and three bullets. So, he decided that he would go out hunting and kill some wild game for dinner. As he went down the road, he saw a rabbit. He shot at the rabbit and missed it. The rabbit ran away.

Then he saw a squirrel and fired a shot at the squirrel and missed it. The squirrel disappeared into a hole in a cottonwood tree. As he went further, he saw a large wild "Tom" turkey in the tree, but he had only one bullet remaining. A voice spoke to him and said, "Pray first, aim high and stay focused." However, at the same time, he saw a deer which was a better kill. He brought the gun down and aimed at the deer. But, then he saw a rattlesnake between his legs about to bite him, so he naturally brought the gun down further to shoot the rattlesnake.

Still, the voice said again to him, "I said 'Pray, Aim high and Stay focused." So, the man decided to listen to God's voice. He prayed, then aimed the gun high up in the tree and shot the wild turkey. The bullet bounced off the turkey and killed the deer. The handle fell off the gun and hit the snake in the head and killed it. And, when the gun had gone off, it knocked him into a pond.

When he stood up to look around, he had fish in all his pockets, a dead deer and a turkey to eat for his family. The snake (Satan) was dead simply because the man listened to God."

Life is Good!
... it's even better when we obey that still, small voice...

"She Took The High Road"

How would you like to be remembered? At our recent Church Council retreat we were given an assignment to create our own, personal, coat-of-arms. We were to depict various characteristics and traits, accomplishments, growth opportunity areas and, finally, three words we'd like to have etched on our tombstones! I had trouble with the three words. Although, naturally, LIFE IS GOOD did come to mind. (The humor that epitaph might elicit wasn't lost on me, either.)

When installed as a member of Congregation Council these words are spoken: "It will be your responsibility to see that the words and deeds of this household of faith reflect him in whose name we gather. You are to work together with other members to see that the worship and work of Christ are done in this congregation, and that God's will is done in this community and in the whole world. You are to be diligent in your specific area of serving, that the one Lord who empowers you is glorified. You are to be examples of faith active in love, to help maintain the life and harmony of this congregation."

As an elected officer these words take on magnified importance. I have prayed, listened, responded, acted, and been present when it was necessary and important to maintain the life and harmony of my congregation through an example of faith active in love. God has placed me in this position of trust and responsibility, He has faith in me. I've had to dig deep; ethical questions and situations take on a new focus when acting on behalf of so many others, each day brings a new challenge. I know that I must prove at all times that God's faith and trust aren't misplaced in me. I tackle every situation head on. I can't deal in rumor or innuendo, but must stick to the facts. Emotions and personal feelings can make the water murky when a clear answer must be found. I play fair, by the rules; and expect everyone else to do the same. I keep lines of communication open at all times, for everyone. Closed doors and small, divisive groups are counter-productive. As I type this I am well aware that today is only February 1st, still a long eleven months left in this elected position! With God's help and guidance, much can be accomplished, in His name; and the time will pass quickly.

So, back to those three words; the assignment has stayed with me. I thought of "She Played Fair", I like to believe that I always do, but that didn't quite capture the spirit that I hope to communicate after I'm gone. I don't think I can limit the words to just three, I've decided now that I need five. (I don't know if I would have known this much about myself before this last month of daily challenge.) My phrase captures even more than playing fairly; it says that I will rise to a challenge, that I am bound to uphold a high level of ethical and moral justice, that I seek to understand before being understood, that I can stand up for myself and for what's right. How do I know that I can be and do all these things? Because God is by my side! With confidence, and faith active in love, my words are these:

Life is Good!

WIGIAT?*

*Where Is God In All This?

I'm shaken beyond understanding regarding this senseless massacre at Va. Tech. Where are we safe? How could this happen in Blacksburg, VA? How could this happen anywhere? My 'mother's heart' is split wide open with sympathy for other mothers and yet their pain is so far apart from anything I can relate to or feel. I am left in shock and reeling from such profound, deep sadness. Where is God in all this? He's right where He's always been reminding me that there is good, there is God, everywhere; good triumphs over evil every time. The sunshine will break through the clouds, it's been there all along. It means more today than ever to know that "Life is Good", on days like this, though, my head needs to convince my heart all over again. Please join me in prayer for the families, for the school, for the Virginia Tech community in these next few days. I pray that God's sure and certain presence will be recognized, will break through, and provide merciful comfort and steady reassurance where it's needed the most.