Do The Right Thing

My husband came in with the mail in his hand after being gone this morning. "Someone knocked our mailbox over" he announced. I was shocked, I had been outside with Hannes only about an hour earlier and I knew the mailbox was standing upright at that time. "Did you see anything?" he asked. The only thing I could recall was seeing a substitute mail carrier (different car) go down our next door neighbor's driveway just after I had been outside. I wondered if the mail carrier had struck our mailbox while backing out from the neighbor's driveway. I thought it was strange though; if that were the case, wouldn't they have come to the door to report it? My husband then told me that another neighbor was out walking when he drove in; she told him that the mail carrier had been driving erratically and almost hit her husband's car. This fact helped cement our suspicions, but still, we hadn't actually seen this happen. My husband phoned the post office and asked if they would inquire about this incident of the carrier, they agreed that they would. Half an hour later the doorbell rang. It was the carrier, filling in for our regular mail lady this weekend. "Yes", she admitted, "I hit your mailbox and knocked it down." She offered to pay for the damages. There aren't any damages with a cost value to speak of, it's a case of repairing the post and standing it back up; this is a matter of principle... and character. When our children were growing up we taught them to do the right thing. "If you break something, confess right away, don't wait until you get caught to set things straight", we admonished. I am happy that our mail carrier did come back and ring the doorbell, but not that she waited until after we reported it to ask for forgiveness. Sadly, the high road seems to be the one less traveled anymore. The one final question I have is this one: did she put today's mail in our box before or after it was lying on the ground?  I'm disappointed, I'll bet her mother would be too.

Life is Good!

"Go Ahead, I Asked..."

You may remember that a short while ago I posted about the movie Fireproof and how much my husband and I liked it. The premise of the movie is a forty day "love dare", or challenge, designed to be approached deliberately and with conscious commitment to make one's marriage stronger, it is based on scripture. I believe we already have a strong marriage but what was the harm in exploring this concept further? I decided to give it a try. It's a day to day process and my husband doesn't know that I am doing this. On day five this challenge was put forth: "Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only." Hmmm. I wondered about this one and decided to just come right out and ask him. I assured him beforehand that I was going to ask him a question because I really, truly, wanted an honest opinion and there would be no negative repercussions. He just stared at me. He told me he couldn't think of anything I did that made him uncomfortable or irritated. He's a smart man. "Go ahead, I urged... it's OK, I asked". Nope, nothing. He said he'd think about it. Later on, at bedtime I crawled in wearing my favorite threadbare T-shirt and worn out pajama bottoms. "That's one thing you could change" he said, quietly. "Huh"? "You asked me to tell you three things, that's one". I was flabbergasted... I expected "you talk too much, you're opinionated, you worry too much"... something along those lines, but never considered a brutal review of my threadbare sleepwear! "Really?" I asked, incredulously, this is something that bothers you? "Yes, he went on, it's really a hodgpodge of things you pull out of that drawer to sleep in, don't you have anything nicer?" I laughed. "Sure I do, a few things, I don't know what I'm saving them for!" I guess I'll be putting together some things to make a run to Goodwill soon, I know that someone could use an otherwise perfectly good Tonight Show T-shirt!

Life is Good!

Imprints

We are who we are because of the people and experiences that have left imprints on our lives. I've had many life-teachers, one stands out as a bright and shining example of honesty and integrity; I don't even remember her name. When I was twenty-one years old I worked for The Singer Company at Tippecanoe Mall in Lafayette, IN; I was the bookkeeper. The store was open from 1 PM until 5 PM on Sundays, every once in a while I had to take my turn on a Sunday shift. One such Sunday I was working along with a fellow employee, John. He didn't much like working Sundays, either; he was a service technician and was as eager to close out that afternoon in March as I was. It had been a slow day and as we we approached closing time, I was cutting fabric for a lone customer. John slid one of the front doors closed at five o'clock and closed out one of our two cash registers, he waited for me to finish up so that we could lock up and each go home. The customer needed some notions to go along with her fabric purchase; finally, I carried her accumulated items to the register and rang up the sale. John had readied a bag for me, it was waiting on the counter, I slid her items inside and he locked the door behind her. I totaled out the register and looked for the receipts, checks and cash from the other cash drawer while John locked up the office. We only needed to drop these into the bank deposit as we exited the mall and we were free to leave for the day! I asked John where the contents of the other cash register were and he gave me the strangest look... "In the bag..." he responded, in what I remember as sort of a strangled whisper. "Bag?" I questioned; but we both already knew what had happened. He'd placed the money in the very same bag that I had sent home with our last customer. She was now carrying fabric and matching thread along with most of our day's receipts! I can recall, even now, the cold, sinking feeling of absolute panic that was overwhelming me as John ran in circles around the store before bolting to the parking lot in an attempt to find her. It was too late, the parking lot was empty. We didn't know the customer, she'd paid by cash, we had no way to contact her. We didn't have a choice, we had to call our manager. At first he couldn't believe that we would do anything that absent-minded, but when he figured out that we were serious he asked that we each come in the next morning before opening. We were both certain that we were losing our jobs. He sat us down and closed the office door, I'm sure we must have looked absolutely pitiful. He didn't fire us but rather gave us a pep-talk and then told us about all the times he'd screwed up and how people had given him second chances when he felt he hadn't deserved them. We both were relieved, able to breathe again, and yet still felt like we'd let people down; we had much to prove now that we'd been let off the hook. Less than fifteen minutes later our boss came strolling out of the office wearing a huge smile. The customer had phoned, she'd found the money and was returning it right away! I was amazed, I hadn't even dreamed that might happen! Somehow The Journal and Courier got wind of the story and printed a small article in the next day's paper entitled: "Singer Co. Pads Lady's Purchase". (I still have a copy of that article in a scrapbook somewhere.) We took some good-natured ribbing for awhile from customers and fellow mall employees who'd stop by and ask if we were giving away any money that day, things like that. But, as long as I live, I'll never forget the look on that dear lady's face when she returned that bag of money thirty three years ago, she was so exceedingly joyful. (So was I!) She was the human face of honesty and integrity; she taught me so much... simply through the way she lived her life. I am who I am today because of the scores of people and myriad of experiences that have left imprints on me; joyful, indelible imprints!

...I am deeply appreciative...
Life is Good!

Let's Be Honest

... for the sake of just that, honesty! I deal with people honestly and rationally, I expect the same in return. I am disappointed and frustrated when that doesn't occur. When my children were little and they wanted something, anything, I would listen to their requests and they would have to listen in return to my response. That's the way it was then, that's the way it is now... from a very young age they knew that they were being heard but they didn't always get what they requested. As adults they have learned to deal with similar situations, be they personal or professional, and move ahead. They are trustworthy, honest, rational adults and I am very proud of them. If an individual behaves in a dishonest and irrational manner with me I am forced to take a step back and wonder how in the world this person was raised as a child, I have little tolerance for this in adults who should know better. I am reminded today of Paul's 2nd letter to the Corinthians, chapter 4, verses 1- 2: "Therefore, having this ministry by the mercy of God, we do not lose heart. We have renounced disgraceful, underhanded ways; we refuse to practice cunning, or to tamper with God's word, but by the open statement of the truth we would commend ourselves to every man's conscience in the sight of God." If we are not true of heart and clean of conscience then how can we face the cross on Friday, or better yet, the empty tomb on Sunday and profess to understand?

I don't think we can.
Life is Good!